How do I stop having bad thoughts
Negative thinking is the easiest way to slow down your business and personal goals. But how do you get rid of negative thoughts? There are a number of ways to do it, and the one you choose is likely a personal decision.
We asked members of the Forbes Coaches Council for advice on how to banish negative thoughts so that their goals can be more easily met. The perspectives varied widely, but they all had one idea in common: You are in control. Our experts gave us their best tips, and this is what they had to say.
Practice becoming aware of when these thoughts come up. Are you tired, hungry, disappointed, stressed or something else? When we try to ignore negative thoughts, they don’t go away, they continue to pop up. To counteract them, recognize them. Let your internal voice say, “I’m recognizing a negative thought; it’s a story I’m telling myself, and it’s not true.” This squashes negativity pretty fast. – Frances McIntosh, Intentional Coaching LLC.
Do you want to catch a cold? Get around people with a cold. I am not sure that advice still stands, but it certainly means something to me when coaching others. I see a lot of people associating with like-minded and often negative people when they are trying to change something in their lives, like a job. Negative people are not optimistic. Get around positivity physically, through your ears and eyes.
Expecting everything to be perfect can be debilitating and robs you of true happiness. Make sure your vision of success is steeped in reality. For example, if you are promoted next year — instead of this year, as expected — does one year really change anything in the long run? Striving for goals with a detachment to the end state having to be perfect can be a liberating way to live on your own terms.
There are no substitutions for a bulletproof mindset. Finding a practice that works for you is key. When coaching different types of clientele (executives, millennials, entrepreneurs), each group works differently. The one thing I have found to be true and practical is that there is no standard practice. Your mindset practice is completely personalized and will evolve depending on what limiting beliefs you are trying to remove, as well as what positive traits are you trying to instill in your daily routine. The most important advice I can give is “stick with it.” Get into a routine, find what works, and don’t stop until you have mastered the program you choose.
Thinking starts early in the morning. When a leader controls their thinking, they control their life. Negative thinking can slow a leader down. Leaders must take every thought captive by replacing thoughts of fear with thoughts of hope and belief. One tool that many great thinking leaders use is to develop a morning routine where they read something encouraging and positive every morning.
Assuming a positive attitude is an intentional action that starts as soon as you wake up in the morning. Become aware when you are focusing on the negative and make the decision to focus on the positive instead. Your attitude is a choice. You attract what you focus on, so let go of that which does not serve your goals. The more you practice positive mind-shifts, the easier it becomes.
When you notice that negative thoughts or images are starting to enter your mind, try actually say “stop!” to yourself. If you’re alone, you can try saying this out loud, but it can also be very effective when just said in your head.
If you prefer, you can use language that’s stronger than “stop” (such as “Get out of my head!” or even something a bit more colorful). For people who aren’t as moved by words, images can be more powerful. The classic example is a bright red stop sign that you picture in your mind’s eye when intrusive thoughts begin to appear.
There are also some more direct approaches to thought stopping. For example, you can try the old tactic of splashing your face with water or just change the direction of your thinking. Some people like to count backward from 100 to 1.
For example, if you’re working to find a new partner using the Law of Attraction and catch yourself thinking that you don’t deserve love, you can say “I am a valuable, lovable person and I will find a great relationship.”
Secondly, however, saying affirmations on a daily basis starts to reshape your thinking, making them a powerful tool even when you’re already in a good mood. Design your affirmations carefully, and try making eye contact with yourself in the mirror when you recite them.